You Cannot Be Your Actual Self Without Personal Development

 If there is one thing that will hold you back from achieving your goals it's complacency. If there's one thing that will hold you back from becoming your true self it's a lack of personal development. 

Unfortunately, life is unpredictable which means we only have so much control over what happens around us. So, the key to happiness and finding your real self is by focusing on what you can control. What you can control is you. You have control over your drive, your values, and your behavior. You control whether you know yourself and act authentically. 

If your words and deeds are not in alignment, you're only cheating yourself. This disparity hampers your growth. Living authentically is a lifetime process, it's ongoing as though you're peeling off layer after layer of an onion. The experiences that you have in life teach you about yourself. Combined, those experiences form the person that you are. 

If you want to find the catalyst for living authentically, look no further than personal growth. You will live more authentically when you act in alignment with your inner guidance system. Let's consider how best you can do that. 

Expressing Your Views 

Are you passionate about your beliefs and feelings? You shouldn't feel pressured by the people around you to fall in line with the status quo. If you want to be your real self, then you have to hold true to your beliefs and values. You can't do that unless you take the time to get to know those beliefs and values, your real beliefs, and values, not the ones impressed upon you by your environment. 

For example, if you were raised in a specific religion and continue to attend church as an adult, have you ever taken a moment to challenge those beliefs? Many people keep attending church and believe simply because their parents believe. You might come out the other side with your beliefs intact, but it's important to ask questions so you know what values and beliefs are truly yours. 


This might not help you become your authentic self but learning how to listen to others properly is an important step in personal growth. It isn't always about you and empathy is important. Listen to the people around you with genuine interest and compassion. 

Know Your Faults 

We all have our faults, but a big part of personal development is getting to know those and acknowledging them. You can't look away, you have to deal with them head-on. It's part of personal development and part of being your real self. 


What makes your life feel richer? You need to be consciously aware of those things to fully enjoy the experience. Be open to learning more, both internally and externally. 

No People-Pleasing 

You cannot live your life for anyone else. You have to live your life for yourself, otherwise, you will always be miserable. Don't worry about finding approval in others because it will stunt your development. Remain focused on achieving self-approval. 

Understanding & Recognition 

We won't all agree about everything or even anything. You can't automatically label others as wrong and you as right. A big part of personal development is improving your understanding. Likewise, it doesn't hurt to recognize others' lived experiences. Don't dismiss others simply because you haven't had the same experience. 

Take Responsibility 

You can only control so much, but for those things in your locus of control, you need to take responsibility. A big part of personal development is holding yourself accountable for your behavior, thoughts, words, and outcomes. 


Forget material wealth, anyone who judges you based on what you have is not someone to concern yourself with. Regardless of material wealth, you are valuable and you deserve love. That love has to begin within you. 

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